I'm going to moan and groan in this post. You have been warned.
Yesterday I finally bit the bullet and went down to the local clinic to get my Official First Pregnancy Test done so I can start regular doctor's visits.
I know I left it a bit late, seeing as I'm going on four months here. But as I learned when I was pregnant with my first two, if you don't go to the doc until after the first 3 months, there's a bunch of tests they can't do on you. You know, a bunch of those tests that tell you something's horribly wrong with the baby and you should abort it right now.
Those ones that are only about 40% accurate and give false positives all the time. Yeah, THOSE tests.
Anyway, I also left it a bit late because I hate going to the clinic.
Someday we'll have decent insurance and I won't have to go there. But until then, lowest common denominator, and that's the clinic.
I went equipped with a thick book, and stuff to write my menu and grocery list on, since I hadn't done that. I knew I was in for a long wait, because you have to stand in the Walk Ins line for a pregnancy test. They don't let you make an appointment for it.
So I stood in line for an hour. I got my lists all made and ploughed through a decent chunk of my book. My book being The Dark Lord of Derkholm, which is 517 pages, I thought it was a good candidate for a long, long doctor's office visit.
Finally made it up to the clerk, and found out the test was only going to be half price, since they like returning patients. That was nice. I got my number and sat down.
Slowly the waiting room drained out, and they called all the numbers above and below mine, but never mine. So I read my book and waited. And waited. And waited some more.
Finally I noticed the various nurses packing up and leaving, and I was the last person still waiting. So, feeling near tears (this was now two hours later), I got up and asked the clerk if they had called my number. She checked, looked horrified, and said that they'd be with me in just a moment.
And indeed, in just a moment they whisked me into the back, did the test, filled out my paperwork, and had me all finished up in about five minutes. Turns out I'm due April 9th. If I can hit this due date, I'll have a birthday in March, April, and May.
Oh, dear clinic. My first visit back, you make me wait three and a half hours because you forgot about me. How I have not missed our long, awful relationship.